Academically bright, socially poor

Updated: 2014-01-07 08:04

(China Daily)

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A 31-year-old female doctorate, accompanied by her mother, has met 19 men on "blind dates" in six months, but has been unable to find a life partner. Since a woman with a doctorate's degree usually does not have a problem in finding a suitor, so her blind date experience is worth looking into, says an article on people.com.cn. Excerpts:

The woman's mother has said that she accompanied the young woman on the "blind dates" because the latter has never been in a relationship and thus didn't have the social experience to interact with a potential suitor. The mother also said that she wanted to protect the young woman from "trouble".

But the presence of an older woman is enough to drive many potential suitors away, because they may fear that the date is immature and emotionally and physically too dependent on others to have a relationship, let alone enter wedlock.

The mother, therefore, should be held responsible for the young woman's failure to find a suitor. The older woman's behavior also shows that because of her over-protective nature, she has not allowed her daughter to face the ups and downs of life. The enthusiasm to protect her daughter forced the older woman to accompany her daughter to interview her potential son-in-law on the "blind dates".

The young woman should also share the blame for her failures. She has to find out why she has been unsuccessful in finding a life partner despite being successful in her academic life. Is it because of lack of social experience and the courage to make independent decisions?

Parents in today's society have to learn to let their children explore the world and make their own decisions. By teaching their children to deal with success as well as failures, parents can prepare them to understand the ways of the world and make decisions on their own.

The public, however, should be more tolerant toward and supportive of people who excel in academics but are found wanting when it comes to practical knowledge, and provide them with enough social space to overcome their shortcomings.

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